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[Random Excerpts from my novel...work under progress.....[6 pages so far]..it shall be on a bookstore near you by your grandson's 18th b'day :P]


Trrringg Triiinggggg....the cacophony engulfed the room.
He took his hand out from the blanket....searching for the damned phone !!

"Hello........" he somehow managed to take the words out from his sleep craving being

"We are dead !!!"

"Johnnnnyyyyyy........Saturday morning 10 AM...are you out of ur mind???.......this is like middle of night ....I'm soo gonna kick ur ass man"

"Broadband bill......it has come"

Long Pause. Both were scared. Petrified actually.Both of them just got new broadband connections.First in college to do so.Both thought they had the night 2 to 8 free plan. Sadly that wasn't the case.

In their ignorance they found the bliss of unlimited download.All new movies,Counter Strike Latest Edition,Tory Lane Mega Pack.....they were the stars of campus overnight.

"Fukkk......how much???"

"17900 !!"

"Death....."

"Go run find ur postman.....it shouldn't get delivered  home at least "

He sprang up from his bed before the sentence was complete,Phone left hanging.
10:15 AM....that guy must be around somewhere........He was running on road in his bathroom slippers like a pig. Somehow managed to procure the bill safely.

He looked at his bill....15900 !!

Both sat on the fountain near campus....their usual spot. Rum in hand.......with their long faces.

"Mabbe we won't tell anyone"

"Yeah, Its one of those things "

Both looked at each other....and burst out laughing. This is how every problem was received in this group.

Nobody knows how these two managed to pay off the bill. Rumors say their families were disturbed about sudden rise in engineering college fees. But no one knows for sure.

Then one day a letter comes.It was from the telecom company. "We cordially invite our premium customers to join us for the dinner in the city palace". Both called each other again.The familiar roar of laughter followed.

Random Excerpts

[Random Excerpts from my novel...work under progress.....[6 pages so far]..it shall be on a bookstore near you by your grandson's 18th b'day :P]


He looked on to the boy in his tattered clothes struggling with his rickshaw.The view from his top floor plush office was handpicked so that the regal lords could gaze on to the ocean.He,however, couldn't take his eyes off from the young boy fidgeting with his tools in vain.

Audacity of his plush office was annoying. Appalling in fact.As he stood on the granite floor,the contrast between the man and the surroundings was loud. Yet it seemed as if  maybe it was the room which deserved the man, not vice versa.

The elevator opened,the suave business clad man was headed straight to the street.He squatted besides the boy.The contrast, was almost amusing.

The boy gave a blank stare.Man was looking straight onto his broken chain of the rickshaw.

"See this??"
boy took a long grease stained plier in his hand.
"I'll hit you with this.I'm like dead pissed anyways and i dont want another NRI to use me for a "HANDS ON" experience with India"

"Can't fit the screw there?"

Boy Gasped.Such precise diagnosis?? This guy know a thing or two about rickshaws allright.

"Ji Saab, Broke from here.Now it just won't fit."

"2 Rupees"

"Ji Saab??"

"It'll cost you 2 bucks"

"You'll repair it?"

"Nah, Jugaad ! "

"Then 2 Rupees is very expensive actually !!"

Both smiled at each other. Man took out his business card and folded it several times.He then fixed it in the Gap which was causing the problem. The screw fitted like a dream.

"Tea?? You're paying"...the man pointed towards the small shack on the roadside.

The two sipped on as the evening faded out to the chilling night.

Somewhere I Belong..........

We all come across situations where we have the immediate "I don't belong here" reaction. This could be near that vindictive boss of yours,maybe with that hysterically bitchy and depressingly dark humoured group, maybe when you are listening to same old story of ur childhood e^10098! th time from your grandma ...{and certainly on this blog ! } ....

Whatever.............the point is such instances are easy to identify. Have you ever tried to describe your version of utopia in specifics...ever?

For some it'll be easy........1 Hectare of farm and world class Marijuana  on it pls...thank you. Some people like Mr Cameron go ahead and spend $500 million to make a visual world called Pandora !

I think for most of us it'll be a complicated process. It's amalgamation of bits and pieces from a lots of location.

Being the geek that i am, I am trying to undertake this herculean task in a scientific manner. You have to decide a  totally new co-ordinate systems and totally new dimensions, where we are taking the TIME and EXPERIENCE as our referral points. (By now it must be quite clear that  I suck in  maths and that its a disgrace to conventional mathematics to redefine dimensions !! :P )

What are the instances which made me feel that "THIS IS WHERE I BELONG !!"? What will form my utopia: lets see .....


Times when I am with my closest friend's.......laughing away to glory. Humor levels reach unimaginable heights..A height unknown to everyone I know....and the location axis is an obscure mountain right in the heart of the city which was an accidental  discovery ! nobody knows that location except our group.....It's there in car with these guys when I get my Utopian moment......The sounds of laughter start echoing on a low pitch...and time slows down, everything's in a slow motion......

....I guard these times with the gang with my life ! There is no money which can get you the experience i m describing........you  can relate to it only if you have or have had a truly special set of friend's.

• On  stage......with mike in my hand..........I wanted to sing in front of a mad  crowd since childhood.....and I did that in college.....in front of 2000 extremely mad and insane crowd.And then i did it again...and then again  :P.........I sang "she fukin hates me"....I could have died there on stage and still wouldnt complain....I "fukin" loved it

• IRODOV.......this russian dude deserves an entire entry for himself....thts later......those of you who thought of physics as an art know the pedestal of this book. This book had the most badass "ill suck your blood u limp whore" problems of physics in it. And every problem took you to a different world altogether.........the kind of feeling which use to get in the initial days of solving irodov's problem succcessfuly was "sorrry, no adjective found" feeling. I wanted to spread my my hands and run around the house shouting.........It's definately a part of my Utopia

• Moments which ive experienced travelling alone................Once when I hitchiked my way to another city on the back of a truck..with other villagers ...It was a mixed feeling....."THis is awesome"+"I dont belong here".......this boils down to ..."WHY DON'T I BELONG HERE " .....and i'm repenting why i declined the offer to  marry that tattooed gal called Jalebi on the back of the  truck that day. :D

• The moments when during the impossibly difficult paper, the topper guy in front nudged just a bit so that i could get a glimpse ;) ...........during one of those papers where i sat blankly staring at the fan ....I had calculated that keeping the weight and hence the width of the guy in front constant....I could see the entire paper if he turned just 11.5 degrees to the left..................If i were a X man.....copying paper from behind in situations impossible to others would be my power !

The list will obviously continue...........What makes your utopia btw :P

"Key" to the "bored"..keyboarding

Early mornings perhaps are the best to write something.Add winters to the scene and its better ! It's difficult to blog for old fashioned ppl like me,i still am more comfortable writing than typing, or lets just say i still am able to distinguish between the two :P my twin co-relates writing instantly to typing, and pen paper is some non-existent entity for her which is used sporadically to sign on credit card bills !

From the look of it this looks like a long entry, and quite honestly thts is exactly wat i planned. But, i think ill sketch something instead ! (where's my pencil?)

Maybe one day ill upload scans of my written journal  !

100 facts about myself

1 : I am basically a geek deep down, behind the cool "facade"  
2: My grammar and spellings suck these days  
3: I am hell scared of my job.it's risky.  

4:I dont give a flying fuck abt cricket, but I can speak full name of W.P.U.J Chaminda Vaas,  

in one breath, its warnakudesuriya patabadige usantha joseph chaminda vaas.

Concealed Conversations of Camaflouged Kind

One thing which prevents me always from writing the stuff is that i start judging beforehand. I want to write about such a wide spectrum of topics that it could put even put my neighborhood aunts mouth to shame. She is blessed with this paragalactic power by the virtue of which she can comment, discuss and judge the following topics in one go :

1. Obama's white house celebration and his credit policies towards PWC and all
2. Neighbors daughter's latest selection of wardrobe, (ot the lack of it)
3. Ranbir Kapoor's T's in the latest filck
4. How karnataka police sux coz they caught a kasmiri without proof !!!

All this, in one breath my friends. She makes 2 pac reel in his grave.

Whew, me and my randomness!


Anyways, I have decided to write stuff on a daily basis. Whatever come to my mind. And I kind of don't care. Because I am writing not for you my reader, I am writing for myself.

I want to write about Travel, about books, about my guitar, about my brush with corporate life, My collision with corporate politics, about my failures to plan my future, about my obessession with the concept of entropy in physics, about GOD,About Ghosts, I want to convince myself that Kurt Cobain is dead, I want to write about how my education inspite of being from the best institues of this country, is still hollow.

And I want to ask, ask my school how come i was taught how to find number of zeroes in 123989! but not taught how to file my IT returns. Ask why i was caned in front of school when I couldn't recite the poetry well but not told that even if I do survive this ordeal I will basically end up working myself crazy being a part of a network which was designed to make someone rich ! How come I wasn't taught how to make my own networks ?

And I wanna talk, about your obesession with firecrackers, burning your money away in front of a begger whose kid is dying in his arms cause of hunger ! I wanna talk about campuses of premier institutes of this country like the one to which i belong, and ask how come the sex ratio is 27 males : 1 Female ? I wanna talk about the new grading system in 10th, wasn't it preparing the kids to face what they are going to face after two years anyway?

And I wanna tell, about my travels. I wanna tell that I am fascinated by twitter as of now. About how i have lived my life on wheels this last one year. About how in three month's I ended up in Chamber's of VP's and CEO's from my college's maggie corner (where I still owe 27 bucks..shhh dont tell, thts a fortune there. I am the john dillinger of the campus). I wanna tell ppl how 12th standard is basically the most important year of your life in India, and kinds of decides what you'll end up doing for your future, so not to fret your entire school life. I wanna tell people that if you could prognosticate entropy spikes of your life, you could end up prediciting your future !! I wanna tell my gang that I play electric guitar now, and cobain's solo's at that :)

I wanna write, I wanna tell, I wanna ask........and I will.

Cantankerous Chivalries of Calculation kind !!!

"Treat Maths like a Lady" are the words which echo in my ears since the time i was learning 2+2 !! i can't recall who said that??but i guess i somehow ended up taking this advice a bit too seriously !!!So if a girl is that "open the door + pull the chair + take me to the opera " types, i would do exactly the same, i would never take her to the local rap contest held every Friday where people rap against each other in a language that could make even a psycho war viking weep !! And vice versa of course. The point being, i wouldn't cross the domain ever. When it comes to ladies and maths, there are no subsets, or so i thought !!!


But in the recent transport phenomena paper, i came across an integral which looked upon me as if muralitharna would look at a local five year old on the strike. But then i did the unthinkable, i broke the rule. I crossed the line, and applied a throem which before this i had applied only in algebra. In short, i treated my integral like a bitch !!!

It was like taking a cheerleader girl to the annual Mensa director's challenge contest, or taking the literature professor to the annual fan convention of the third Jedi of star wars. It was like calling a queen a "whore" on her face !!

But what followed was amazing, the answer came before i realized in five fukin steps. The arrogant and proud Integral ended up being completely submissive.

The problem with unsuccessful lovers of maths like us is that we are too conservative in ways which we try to woo her. U gotta twist HER arm a little, Let maths be the one who's helpless in front of your plethora of approaches. I read this lady's mind people, so go ahead and try whatever u want to in maths with total liberty. Next time solving a triangle, assume the equilateral, there's always one voice which told us, "fuk...look , the diagram looks like an equilateral". this claim was shut by saying that it isnt "given" that its equilateral. SO what ....90% of problems can be solved by legitimate assumptions.

I wish i read a blog like this when i was in 11th, and i also wonder if the same approach could work with difficult gals too !!! anyways, lets leave this domain for now, coz solving a complex math problem is never as complex as wooing a girl :) , Einstein solved the equations of uncertainty principle and got a Nobel, but how many dates did he get !!! see........

Mabbe by the time i end this entry I'll be eligible for "geeks gone bad" website's premium membership, but that's not the point.(Do NOT visit this website if you are under 18 !!). The point is that the way to please Maths was completely different than what i thought. One has to take liberties with her. That's what ppl who are good with it do, they play with it. How many of us do that ? I struggled with maths my entire life, i know that feeling of helplessness which creeps in when you just can't solve that question. That feeling of worthlessness......oh it's horrible. Somewhat similar to what a father feels when his kid points to a passing car as they stand on the bus stand waiting !! It can break you completely.