........
She woke up with the sound of his scratching on paper. Every part of her body could feel that pain which though felt as if she was tired, refreshed her being. Her legs ached and still fell strecthed. She had marks on her waist , her thighs and breasts. Marks so audacious that she will have to take extra care to hide them from the elders in the house for next few days. She felt loved. She felt wanted. She felt like a woman. She also felt owned, amd she was loving it.
"We are leaving for Europe", he said without looking up.He had stopped writing but was looking in the paper. It did not sound like a decision or final diktat. It sounded like a plan. That was his weakness which only she knew. This man was never sure about anything.
"Ya?" She chuckled.
He turned around, " Yes. Europe it is. We have to go. I just want to go and travel. All the great men who have led people have derived their poise and insight from their travels. Look at Netaji, Mahatma, PanditJi. I want to go too. "
She looked at him smiling. It's never just the person you fall in love with. You fall in love with his flaws, his dreams, his nightmares, his innocence, his light, his darkness, his voice, his hands, his smile. This girl was in love.
"When do we plan to leave then? "
"Thursday"
"Thursday? It's Monday today!"
"Yes." He turned around and looked at her. Her sight comforted him. There was this overwhelming urge to hold and crush her little body, always. He wanted to love her and break her. He wanted to hold her like a mother holds her child and like a lion grips his prey, both at the same time. Everytime he touched her he wanted to tsake more of her. It was never enough. It was never complete.
That evening the carrige was prepared in secret and she went to see her doctor. If they had to travel so soon she has to take care of this trouble she had been having. Dr Hathway was a fine gentleman from Bristol who was one of the closest friend of her father in law. Dr Hathaway had however, been a friend to both the kids as well. She went and asked Dr Hathaway what was the result of the blood sample he took.
She was pregnant.
...................,
"So , we just go to Europe and Travel??"
He stopped working on his car and looked up. She was seated in the garden sipping tea.
" What do you mean we " just " go and travel? Thats the thing about Europe, you go there and travel. It's 1932, times are changing. Everyone is travelling anyway. "
"Yes but our reason is different I thought. Is it not about self discovery ??"
He knew she was coming to some serious point. He stopped working and kept his tools down looking at her.
She looked back in silence. He came and sat next to her.
"It is. It is about self discovery"
"Why don' t you take that cambridge degree. We can always travel. Ill join you later on."
"I thought about it. I do not want to be away for so long. I want to be here, in India."
"Some dreams are so grand it is almost impossible to concieve them. You have to go see a mountain before you start building one. "
He kept silent. It was easy for her to talk about him leaving. He was disappointed but did not reveal it.
" And all the names you took, they studied abroad".
Perhaps she was right.
"We are leaving for Europe", he said without looking up.He had stopped writing but was looking in the paper. It did not sound like a decision or final diktat. It sounded like a plan. That was his weakness which only she knew. This man was never sure about anything.
"Ya?" She chuckled.
He turned around, " Yes. Europe it is. We have to go. I just want to go and travel. All the great men who have led people have derived their poise and insight from their travels. Look at Netaji, Mahatma, PanditJi. I want to go too. "
She looked at him smiling. It's never just the person you fall in love with. You fall in love with his flaws, his dreams, his nightmares, his innocence, his light, his darkness, his voice, his hands, his smile. This girl was in love.
"When do we plan to leave then? "
"Thursday"
"Thursday? It's Monday today!"
"Yes." He turned around and looked at her. Her sight comforted him. There was this overwhelming urge to hold and crush her little body, always. He wanted to love her and break her. He wanted to hold her like a mother holds her child and like a lion grips his prey, both at the same time. Everytime he touched her he wanted to tsake more of her. It was never enough. It was never complete.
That evening the carrige was prepared in secret and she went to see her doctor. If they had to travel so soon she has to take care of this trouble she had been having. Dr Hathway was a fine gentleman from Bristol who was one of the closest friend of her father in law. Dr Hathaway had however, been a friend to both the kids as well. She went and asked Dr Hathaway what was the result of the blood sample he took.
She was pregnant.
...................,
"So , we just go to Europe and Travel??"
He stopped working on his car and looked up. She was seated in the garden sipping tea.
" What do you mean we " just " go and travel? Thats the thing about Europe, you go there and travel. It's 1932, times are changing. Everyone is travelling anyway. "
"Yes but our reason is different I thought. Is it not about self discovery ??"
He knew she was coming to some serious point. He stopped working and kept his tools down looking at her.
She looked back in silence. He came and sat next to her.
"It is. It is about self discovery"
"Why don' t you take that cambridge degree. We can always travel. Ill join you later on."
"I thought about it. I do not want to be away for so long. I want to be here, in India."
"Some dreams are so grand it is almost impossible to concieve them. You have to go see a mountain before you start building one. "
He kept silent. It was easy for her to talk about him leaving. He was disappointed but did not reveal it.
" And all the names you took, they studied abroad".
Perhaps she was right.
